Toastmasters Revive the lost art of communication. Throughout the past five years or so, I have noticed that many times I have been interrupted by the other person, and I am sure I have been guilty of the same thing once or a hundred times. That made me think about talking vs. listening. Many of us claim to be good listeners, but it’s not just allowing the other person to speak. It is paying attention to the tone, facial expressions, body language and of course, the heart. When I speak, am I signaling coming in for a landing or do I continue to talk and take up the energy? This is a symptom of an even bigger problem: we are not listening to one another because we are so wrapped up in our own speech and interests. Often, we do not allow the other person to participate in the discussion. When I give a speech in Toastmasters, other than the anxiety and other challenges, I know I will not be interrupted. I also know that someone will be evaluating my speech, so there’s an incentive not only for the evaluator to be silent, but also attentive because that same evaluator will be expected to give me some constructive feedback. While we are engaged in discussions with someone or a small group, it is important that we follow this formula. We need to mirror speech like grammar (or a dialogue) and signal commas and periods. This way, it will be easy to go back and forth. We cannot continue to speak like run-on sentences. People stop listening anyways, and if people are not listening, there cannot be any solutions.
James Pesutich